Your Gun’s so Ugly…

MasterPiece Arms 930T

No offense, but these box guns are ugly as sin. I know that the MAC-10, Tech-9, and UZI have a lot of fans, but be honest with me here; it’s not their beautiful aesthetics that have the appeal. The MAC-10 was the first American submachine gun. It shoots incredibly fast and for being made of cheap stamped metal, a real MAC-10 will cost you roughly $3000. However, for about $500 and without all the FFL licensing, you can get the MasterPiece Arms clone . With all those do-dads attached. Submachine guns draw attention, I ogle UZIs when I see them at the range and they look good in the hands of bad guys in the movies. They’ve gotten a bad rap by being notoriously linked, whether true or not, to violent street gangs. They call these guns, “spray and pray,” but you’re not taking your MasterPiece Arms 930T into battle, so you won’t have to worry about that. You might want to pray just in case though. The MasterPiece Arms 930T holds 30 rounds of 9mm and has a 3.3-inch threaded barrel so you can add a suppressor-, which seems to be the thing to do if you have one of these bad boys.

Cobra Enterprises CB38 Big Bore Derringer .38 Special

Oh God. This thing just makes me sad. You guys know I like pink, but this majestic pink finish just hurts me. But you know what, it’s different, so kudos to Cobra. The Cobra Enterprises CB38 Derringers are replicas of the Remington Derringer from back in the Wild West days. The Remington Derringer was popular with women of ill repute, so I can just picture a single action shooting cowgirl flashing this bright, shiny pink CB38 Derringer. Not that single action shooters are ladies of ill repute, not at all. I mean, I just envision a sharp shootin’ modern day cowgirl liking this gun. Before I type myself into a hole, I’ll tell you about this Cobra Enterprises CB38. It is 100 percent made in the USA from alloy with black synthetic grips. It has two 2.75-inch barrels and shoots .38 Special. It’s a single-action with fixed sights.

Taurus Model 22 Semi Automatic Handgun

Not everyone likes pink, so I guess yellow could be a viable alternative. You know if you want a different color other than black or stainless on your gun. The Taurus Model PT-22 semi-automatic rimfire handgun, chambered for .22 Long Rifle, has a tip-up barrel, which means you can load the first round into the chamber without having to rack the slide. Therefore, the Model PT-22 is a good handgun to introduce semi-automatics to someone who is nervous about being able to operate the slide. It operates in double-action only with a six-pound trigger pull. The Taurus PT-22 with the yellow polymer frame is a Dealer Exclusive model with a 2.33-inch barrel, a manual safety, and fixed sights.

Magnum Research Desert Eagle MK19

I know that I will have many people complain about me picking this out as an “ugly” gun, as there are plenty of Magnum Research fans out there, but see, I’m a silver girl, not gold, and this thing is just hideous. The Magnum Research .50 AE pistol shows up a lot in movies and TV because it is so huge that it looks big, bad, and scary. But in gold? I don’t know about scary. Pretentious, maybe? I like how Magnum Research describes the Desert Eagle: “The combat-type trigger guard is designed for two-handed shooting.” Really? Who is gonna shoot this thing with one hand? .50 AE is a huge caliber! The Magnum Research Desert Eagle has a six-inch chrome-lined barrel, fixed sights, and shoots single-action. It holds eight rounds of .50 Action Express ammunition with Hogue rubber grips and a full Picatinny rail to add a laser or a light. Not to mention that it is covered in 24K gold. Bling. Bling.

Taurus Judge Polymer Public Defender Revolver

I really don’t think the original Judge is ugly, but the polymer Judge is just unsightly. The polymer-framed Taurus Judge is lighter than the original model and has an adjustable rear sight. It holds five rounds of either .45 Long Colt or .410 Bore shotshells in its 2.5-inch chamber. The barrel is 2.5-inches long with a 1:12” twist and six grooves. The Taurus Judge revolvers are hailed as a really good snake gun and are good for a close-quarters self-defense weapon. I can’t afford a private attorney, I’ll take the Public Defender.

None of these are ever going to win a beauty contest, but none of them are horrible guns either. Just because the gun isn’t sexy, doesn’t mean it is crap. Besides, beauty is all in the eye of the beholder, right?

The Mission of Cheaper Than Dirt!'s blog, The Shooter's Log, is to provide information—not opinions—to our customers and the shooting community. We want you, our readers, to be able to make informed decisions. The information provided here does not represent the views of Cheaper Than Dirt!

Comments (4)

  1. Re: MAC-10: the technique, not the gun, is called “spray and pray” + the MPA MAC-10 is fires from a closed bolt and is thus more accurate than the original.

  2. I so agree with you on the ugly factor of the Gold Desert Eagle. However, I would have gone one step further and listed the gold tiger print as the ugliest model they make!!!!!!!

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